Fresh Prince(ss) of Bel Air (Rd)

(Sings) "I'm stuck in a basement, sittin' on a tricycle, girl gettin' on my nerves. Goin' outta my mind. I thought she was fine, don't know if her body is hers."

That's the tune that keeps replaying in my head as I sit on the football field tonight. It's from the episode of Fresh Prince of Bel Air where Will and his girlfriend (played by Tisha Campbell) are madly in love--that is, until they find themselves stuck in a basement for hours, where hunger and irritation overtake them. The ticking clock finds their nerves, and Tisha's character's fabulous look, slowly unraveling.

And so it is with me, as I sit on the football field tonight during the kid's practice, my fab slowly unraveling. My song involves being stuck on the grass and bugs getting on my nerves. My navy H&M sheath dress is hot despite the thinness of the material and the gold & pearl chain around my neck is starting to choke me despite being at least 24" long. My skin itches from bug bites and my hair itches from dust; I want to feverishly rip the pins out of my neatly tucked bun. At least my feet are comfy, due to my changing from gold pumps to gold flats before heading to the field...all-in-all, however, there is very little about this whole scenario that is anything close to chic.

Normally I'm a tough cookie when it comes to football but today I am a hungry, itchy, sleepy princess who wants nothing more than a green vegetable, a hot shower, and a satin pillow. Thank heavens for the Vogue August issue perched atop my lap; after all, something should be fabulous about this 2-hours of torture, even if it's just the evening literature.

In case you wanted to hear the song :) ...